Archive for 2012

10 Reasons To Be Thankful Today

Sa kabila ng mga catastrophic events na nangyayari sa mundo ngayon that creates death, we tend to think about the life we lead. Napapaisip tayo, Oh my sabaw! (ako lang pala yun). In most cases, nagpapasalamat tayo that we're still alive tapos narerealize natin na yung ibang bagay na akala natin ay sobrang bigat na, eh di pala tutumbas sa pinapasan ng iba. And that some shit you worry about isn't as big a deal as it was the day before.

Ang mahirap lang dito eh kung gano ka kadali napaisip nung mga ganung bagay eh ganun din kadali ang pagbalik mo sa pagiging normal. And what I mean with normal is your constant bitching and complaining that you normally do, ay we pala. Di na tayo nagpapasalamat na buhay tayo but instead, we wait for something awful or disastrous to happen to put things into perspective. Ang sarap manampal ng DM's. 

Well anyhow na bangus na may kamatis at sibuyas, here are then ten very simple things to be thankful right now

1. you are reading this blog post, so ibig sabihin, buhay ka pa, sinuswerte nga naman
2. 100% someone out there is in a worse shape than you more ways than one i guarantee you that
3. pusang gala, online ka! That means, nakapagbayad ka ng internet at phone bill nyo, ijot.
4. may tibilisyon ka. Hindi lahat ng tao sa munod mapalad na nanalo ng TV sa pa-raffle ng Central Warehouse Club
5. you have a relative or friend out there that you can talk to. Narealize mo ba kung ilang tao ang nasa san mang panig ng mundo na walang relatives o friends na pwedeng kausapin?
6. may bubong kang nasisilungan.
7. you are free - di lahat ng countries eh may freedom ng tulad ng sa'tin.
8. you slept on a bed last night - think how many people didn't?\
9. you get to have sex - well, some of you. Pero don't you think its awesome?
10. pwede kayong mag isip pa ng another 10 reasons.

Yun lang. Di ko alam kung anong nakain ko at naisipan kong i-type yang mga yan. Pero bahala na si Batman magpaliwanag. Salamat.

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A Secret Affair

Helow helo hilo? Kumusta imaginary friends? Long time no see, but now see now. Ayos lang ba? Sarrreh naman kung ngayon lang ulit nagparamdam. Busy sa eschudent life eh. Alam nyo na, mabait akong eschudent eh. Okay, lessgow sago sa topic.

Napansin ko lang, karamihan sa mga palabas ngayon sa tibilisyon at pelikula, eh dalawang babae na ang nag aagawan sa iisang lalake. Anyare manang? Kaya naisipan ko mag tanong kay Google at pagkatapos ng 0.01784 seconds ay nabigyan nya ko ng 110,789 resulta o kasagutan. Lintek na Google talaga yan oh. Anyhow na bangus, napag alaman kong ang ratio na pala ngayon ng babae sa lalake eh nasa 7:1 na. Daw. Ibig sabihon, may pitong babae sa bawat isang lalake. Oh my sabaw!

Kung iisipin mo nga naman nang mabuti, ramdam na ang kakulangan ng lalake nung magsimula na ang telenovela ni Coco Martin. Mantakin mung, sa dami ng artista, ginawa pa talaga syang dalawa, at may kanya kanyang chikas pa, tsk. Ba't nga ba ito yung tema ko? Eh kasi, nakapanood ako ng movie ni Kuya Derek, yumbang A Secret Affair? Aba tsong, pinag aagawan ng dalawang hot chickens si Koya! Haaaaneep! Sana wag mangyari sakin yon!

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Book Report?

For another couple of nights. Er, maybe weeks, this blog will stink. Well, depends if you're going to drop by and clean this boring niche of mine, LOL. I think I'm gonna be busy. Now there goes the question: Busy doing what?

Woooooooooo. We're asked by our English professor to make some sort of book review (yata, not sure pa) about a Paulo Coelho novel. Anybody familiar with The Alchemist? Yeah that's the one. Hey, if you could give me a report on that, just click on the tab on above (Contact Me), hehe. Just kidding. Even if its just 0.05% from a hundred that our professor will trip on this boring blog, still, its 0.005%, right? :)

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Be Careful of What You Wish For (Lalo na pag may kasunod kang hihiling)

One day, a bus full of not-so-good looking people was stuck on a ditch in a very liblib na place. Then suddenly, a beautiful diwata appeared and made sabi to them that they could make a wish and she will make those wish come true. The first woman on the front seat said,

"I wish to be super gorgeous and beautiful!"

And her wish was granted.

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Signs Ba Kamo?

Pasensya na kung ngayon lang ulit nakapag post? Miss mo ko? LOL

Sa mga umaasa sa signs, nakow, siguraduhin nyo lang na confident kayo :)

See ya later alligater! In a while crocodile :p

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Birthday Guy

Yesterday, 4th of July. While everyone in the United States are flying colorful fireworks, blowing their lungs out on paper and plastic trumpets, straining their arms in waiving the American flag, stretching their necks to see the parades, and crying their hearts out in celebration, I was alone in my room celebrating my birthday with four cups of coffee and a pack of cigarettes.

Celebrated my birthday with a pack of cigarettes, a couple cups of coffee, and a couple of movies :)
Yea yea, some of you my dear imaginary friends would think how lonely my birthday had been. Maybe some dipshit who wanders here for the first time would think that I'm some kind of an introvert, but you're wrong. Actually I'm a psychopath, a frightening one, on weekends, LOL.

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PALiiiTS in School Again

ID (evidence)
Hey hey hey! It's been so long. Since I haven't seen yow face! That wasn't a joke. I know most of you "wandering sweet potatoes" who carelessly wander in this blog are not going to email me your pictures if ever I asked you to. Sorry if I haven't updated this boring niche of mine for like, forever? LOL

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11 Questions About Myself

Hello imaginary friends! Couple of weeks ago, I was tagged by seriousnuts to answer 11 questions about myself. So here it goes;

1. How long have you been blogging?
I started writing online since my college freshman years. I had my first page on tripod, then to Friendster and later tried Blogger.

Are you a procrastinator or do you take care of things right away?
Yea, I procrastinate. I don't know but I always have this idea of "art of keeping up with yesterday" haaa haaaa.

3. If you have siblings, are you close?
Yes we're close. I'm the eldest of us three and the only dude, that's why I'm kinda over-protective over them. Though I can't ask them on some matters, they always find ways to share them to me.

4. What's the best thing about your job? the worst?
The best thing about it is that I don't have to face annoying "real" people and the worst is it alters my body clock. LOL

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Three Best Mothers

This time, my post will be quite serious, and as much as possible, I'm gonna refrain from using foul words like I used to. Eh? If you're still wondering why, I bet you didn't have the time reading the title *winks. See, I'm even nicer to you.

Since we're celebrating Mothers' Day, I think its timely for me to write and share to you how blessed I am to have an awesome line of mothers. Yes, I have mothers, with an "s", pluuuuuural! And sorry, but I wont share them to any of you. Joke. Belonging to a broken family has been a lot easier for me because of my mothers. Because of them, the absence of the so-called "haligi" (foundation) of a home, a father, hasn't really been an issue at all. Well, I must admit that there were times that  I envy my friends when they bring their fathers to school activities, but thinking that I have a lot of Mama's, I'm contented. To honor them, I'll be posting three short poems. I know I'm not very good at this, but nah, I'll take the shot.

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Visual Music Carnival 2012

Hell-ow cool-o-go? Miss me my imaginary friends? I miss you too.

Oh yes, you read it right, a Visual Music Carnival. This is an awesome celebration of visual arts, extreme sports, and rock n' roll music, for a cause. This celebration will happen on May 12, 2012 from 12 noon to 12 midnight at the Amoranto Stadium at Quezon City.

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Happy Earth Day; Seriously?

Is the Earth really happy? Do we deserve to live here?

If we take a survey asking all the people around the world if they deserve this blue-green-white-brown-gray planet called Earth, I'm sure an overwhelmingly large number of these are going to say, "Yes, of course!". Well, what other response could we expect? The opinion of the majority  is expected as this is the mind's response. Even though at the back of the mind of everybody, the knowledge that we haven't treated Earth with respect is there, that the "I, me, mine, my" mentality is fully intact and preserved. If you open up your mind a little wider and take an unflinchingly honest look at mankind and its history, what will you find? Will you still say "Yes, of course!"? 

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12 Places Described By a Single Picture

There are places around the world that can only be summarized by the words "Only in" just because of the things that go on there. So I'm sharing you a few. Hopefully, this'll have a sequel, LOL.

Only in Amsterdam. Hookers are displayed in glass casings. 

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Painting A Room The Metal Head Way

I'm not an interior designer, to begin with, to give you tips on redecorating your room or whatever you want to do with it. Hell, I didn't even study architecture. But every so often, between the boring and busy days of our  lives, something comes along that makes us stop, look, and say, "Hey, that's freaking awesome!". So, with that pretty scratched one-liner of amazement, I felt that it alright to share this dumb discovery. Alright, I've caught wind of a ridiculously amazing video posted by three metal heads. Ostensibly, they had to paint or redecorate a "pink" (hey, pink is a masculine color, b&^%$!), so logically, the first thing that hit their heads is to use their hair instead of paint brush. These three dudes dipped their heads onto a paint bucket, turn on some metal, and started headbanging. Check out the video for the marvelous result.

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My Top 5 Must-Watch Movies This May

Come what may.

Hey, few days from now, Miss April'd be a goner and Miss May'll shake her flowery arse to the people! Anyway, the first line prompted me to write this post, plus the greatness I feel now that I have finished the house plan that held me out from my blog and my ever dearest imaginary readers. Well now, I'm sure some of the movies here are familiar to you, heck, here it goes.

1. The Avengers. Yeah  yeah, they're gonna have the assembly this May. Our childhood superheroes are back, kick some ass!

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More Pun In The Philippines

photo credits to KMJS

Pinoys are generally creative especially in naming everything, genius. No business establishment is deemed too sacred to be spared from creative name-calling, from water purifying stations to bottled water, salons, restaurants, even the smallest business roaming around the Philippines streets. Look around you.

A nickname is the hardest stone that the devil can throw at a man. - William Hazlitt.

 Brilliantly said, and one way to explain why in new world countries, John remains John and Mary will ever be called Mary. But here in the Philippines, though, a nicknamed child is a loved child. And heaven help the child who’s been given a particularly “inspired” nickname.

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12 Funny Quiz Results

When we were in grade school, we're obliged to wake up before 7 am and go to school so we'll be prepared for the adult life ahead of us. Can you still remember all the naughty things you did? (well, if you were one). As I was randomly surfing the net, I came into this photos of quiz results, and I can't help but laugh. Yeah, I know it's kinda low blow to the teachers, but hell, I'm sure these made them chuckle.

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Good News, Bad News

Are you tired of all the daily bad news splattered across every newspapers' front page?

Well, me too.

Husband Shot by Wife, Dead!

Girl, Raped and Killed.

Vice Mayor, Ambushed and Killed.
Stud, Robbed and Killed!
And believe it or not,

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Magnum Ice-sus Cream

"Sus! Ano nangyare sa kanila?" (Jesus! What happened to them?) This is my usual expression everytime I log in to my Facebook account. The news feeds that I've been recieving lately have always something to do about this Magnum Ice Cream. Pictures of people posing with their "royal" ice cream, status messages announcing that they've eaten dozens of Magnum, come on, what's wrong with these people?

photo not mine

 It's not funny anymore. Well yeah, they have their birth right shit to post pictures on their Facebook, but acting like they just won the lottery because they've eaten this nothing but just-another-ice-cream is downright stupid. Even telling their friends that they've been left out if they haven't took a bite or a single fuckin' lick of it. Let me ask you, what's with this Magnum?

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21 Reasons Why I Love The Philippines

When Michael Goodman uploaded a video about the things he hate about the Philippines, I admired his honesty. Sadly, instead of taking it constructively and considering it as a wake up call, most Pinoys took it the other way around. As usual, they made a big fuss about it, even called to "black list" the honest guy. What the fuck?! The guy was just pointing out the obvious things that most of us overlook and considered as "ah okay lang". What  if that was a Filipino dude who made a video like that? Would that be viral too? Will he be black listed too? Ah shit.

Well anyway highway, if he had 20 reasons, I guess I'll make 21 more. I love the Philippines, and you know why? Because Philippines is where;

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Rare Pictures

In the era we are living now, I could say technology have already taken over the world. High-tech gadgets, appliances, are now part of our daily living. One of the greatest gift of technology to us is the computer, but do you know the people behind its development? Here are you'll find what I consider as historic pictures of the people we owe our PC's, laptops, iPhones, email accounts, etc. You can also find the simplicity of how a complex company came into life.

Steve Jobs and Steve Wozniak in March 1, 1976 wanted to start a computer company and they needed a name to register it as incorporation. According to Wozniak, both he and Steve were driving along the Highway 85 between Palo Alto and Los Altos. Steve Jobs came up with a name “Apple Computers” during that trip.

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The New Chic in Town: Simsimi

Simsimi is the hottest chick on Philippine web today. Every morning, whenever I open my Facebook account, screen shots of Simsimi conversations are plastered on my landing page and I'm like, "WTF?". Out of curiosity, a pinch of annoyance, and a teaspoon of boredom, I googled this Simsimi to know why the hell most of my friends, imaginary friends, and supernatural friends are totally hooked up with this yellow ball with a cute and a bit annoying face.

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Hear, Speak, See No Evil

photo not mine

Just this morning, I woke up on the sound of women screaming, children crying and dogs barking. I was so annoyed even though that wasn't the first time it happened here. It's pretty normal in a place like where I live you know. Anyway, I went outside with a big frown on my face, and what I saw slapped me awake. There were two men who're preparing to go at each other, one has a bolo while the other was holding a metal pipe.

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Well, she's turning 28 on this month's eighteenth.

Hello there beautiful skrambol. Oh yes yes, the beautiful lady on the picture is turning 28, and I don't have anything material to give her, so I'll just dedicate my post to her. Stinky cheesy, yes? But then, we know what connoisseurs say about cheese, right? *wink

I've known her when we were a lot younger, one night, at a certain bridge. Yow yes, we first met on a bridge, and it's still intact. I was a shy boy then (haha, walang papalag!), so she made the first move. Guess how did she open up a conversation? She offered me a stick of cigarette, and not just that, she offered me her lighted cigarette. Imagine if I were the one who offered, with all the laway on the filter, and I'm gonna be like, "Hey, ikaw, yosi?", kadirdir diba? Haha. (i love you dude)

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Kony 2012: From A Not-So-Narrow Point Of View

WOW! That was my first impression when I saw that the Kony 2012 video had 66 million views, four days after its upload.

WOW! Another surprise surprise were the comments I read, almost everyone is calling for, 

"Hey man, let's kill this Kony."
"What the, you should wage a war and stop him!".
"Good Lord, they are abusing children, they deserve to die!"

WOW! Third surprise, an organization called "Invisible Children" is behind this video. An obviously anti-war organization.

Whose this Kony anyway? Well, he's just another player here, a minor character of the unfolding story. Hey wait, did you know that the president of Uganda, where Kony is said to be hiding, has committed a crime in a much larger scale than that of Kony? Well, just in case you don't know, this Ugandan president has been involved in the genocide of 7 million people, just in case you didn't know. I'm not saying here that Kony isn't a bad guy, I know, what he did is sickening, but the point is, they are just making Kony an excuse for a greater scheme. That's how I look at it, a scheme by the world's greatest schemer, the US government.

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Facts About Women (sort of)

1. Women love to shop. It is the one area of the world where they feel like they're actually in control. 

2. Women especially love a bargain. The question of 'need' is irrelevant, so don't bother pointing it out. Anything on sale is fair game. 

3. Women never have anything to wear. Don't question the racks of clothes in the closet; you 'just don't understand'. 

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though we have just met,

we have long been together

in a great endeavour,

in a war worth fighting for

in a relationship brought forth

by a great standpoint.

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Til now, I couldn't let a day go by without listening to this adorable kid. I'm a fan of heavy metal music, and the first time I saw this video, thirty minutes after it was uploaded in YouTube, I fell in love with Juliet (I'm not a pedo, you sick ^*$&@*^$!).

Juliet, an eight-year old Brisbane, Australia girl, has become an Internet sensation after the releasing a "brutal" video for "My First Hardcore Song", a track about her pet fishes and dog. *Her mother, Kristina Childs uploaded the video on YouTube.

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Junjun, bakit ka ba nagpatato? Adik ka no? O baka nagaaktibista ka na? Baka sumasali ka sa mga kulto kulto ha.

"Nge, may tattoo pala yung anak ni tito, nakulong na yan?"

At eto yung latest, "Talaga, may tattoo pala yan? Baka kaya nagpunta yan ng Manila kasi may tinakasan sa Davao".

Iilan lang yan sa mga mapanghusgang paningin ng mga tao sa mga tulad ko. Sa lipunang pinamumuhayan natin ngayon, pag may tattoo ka, marumi ka. Kriminal ka. Adik ka. Wala kang kinabukasan. 

Hindi ko sila masisisi, dahil sa Pilipinas, pinipreserba at pinaninindigan ng marami nating kababayan ang pagiging konserbatibo, isang katangiang namana pa natin sa ating mga kanuno-nunoan. Pero nawawala ba ang pagkakonserbatibo ng isang tao pag nagkaroon sya ng pintang di nabubura sa kanyang balat? Bahagi ng ating kultura ang tattoo. Sumisimbolo ito sa katayuan, kakayahan, katungkulan, at maging kadakilaan ng ating mga ninuno. Buong pagmamalaki itong dinadala ng isang tao kahit na san man sya magpunta. 

Pero after how many years, what the hell happened?

Naapektuhan talaga ako nitong napanood kong dokyu, siguro mga 10 times ko na tong pinanood. Ang mga katutubong dati ay proud na proud sa kanilang pagka-pintado, ngayon ay nahihiya na. Kung dati ay napakaganda sa kanila ang may guhit sa balat, ngayon ay nakakadiri na, at pilit nila itong itinatago. Anyare? Kasi daw, pag luluwas ka sa siyudad, nakakatakot ka kung meron kang tattoo. Tatawagin kang taga bundok kung meron kang tattoo. Pandidirihan ka ng KAPWA mo Pilipino. Yung KAPWA mo Pilipinong anak at apo sa katuhod-tuhuran ng mga ipinagtanggol ng mga taong may tattoo. Lahat yan nangyari dahil sa modernisasyon. Hindi naman masama ang umunlad, wag lang sana nating kakalimutan kung saan tayo nagmula. Huwag sana nating hayaang tuluyang manaig ang "westernization" sa ating isipan. It's more fun in the Philippines sabi nga nila, sana nama'y hindi lang para sa mga turistang hinahakot natin ang FUN na yan, kundi para din sa ating mga kababayan.

Sabi nga ni VG, "Porke ba may tattoo kriminal na agad? Di ba pwedeng Igorot lang talaga?".

Maganda pa ang nanay ko sa umaga. Happy kaarawan mama :D

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Usapang Larawan

Naniniwala ka ba dito? Sana pala hindi tsinelas ang pinamimigay ni Korina sa mga bata. Sana sapatos na lang para mabago naman ang buhay nila. Kayo, may sapatos na ba kayo? Bili na nang mabago na rin ang buhay ninyo :)


Oo nga naman. Malay mo naghahanap lang din sya ng Cinderella shoes? O pwede ring papunta talaga sya ng SM, wla nga lang pamasahe :)

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Rare Finds (Bihirang Makita)

This ComEx day, I had a hard time thinking on what to post, haaaa haaaa haaaaa. So today, I'll just give you five (5) of the world's "rarest".

 The "silkie chicken"
The Silkie (sometimes incorrectly spelled Silky) is a breed of chicken named for its atypically fluffy plumage, which is said to feel like silk. The breed has several other unusual qualities, such as dark blue flesh and bones, blue earlobes, and five toes on each foot (most chickens only have four). They are often exhibited in poultry shows, and come in several colors (red, gold, blue, black, white, and partridge).

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Midnight Raid

I guess you're thinking that what I'm goin' to talk about right now is some historic raid in WWII or some Operation Desert Storm-like raid, yes? No? Yes? No. Whatever.

photo from

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Dahican; Not Your Ordinary Beach

Maybe you're starting to feel the heat as summer is fast approaching, and there's one thing on your mind; beach. Some of you are now scouring the web for cheaper but beautiful resorts around the Philippines, and one factor you're considering to see on a beach; white sand.

Well I guess there are still a lot of travel bloggers who haven't heard about Dahican.

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Pulp Summer Slam 12

Pulp Live World Productions, Inc. will again bring you the annual music festival Pulp Summer Slam 12: The Apostles, the riot of local and international bands, this April 28, 2012 at the usual pit Amoranto Stadium in Quezon City. 

The 12th slam will be headlined by Archenemy, August Burns Red, Bless the Fall, Darkest Hour, Periphery and We Came As Romans.

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Dave and Marla

The following joke is Rated-18.

While attending a spelling session in school one day, the teacher asked if anyone could spell the word DUMB? Darla raises her hand.

Marla:  I can, I can.
Teacher: OK, go ahead Darla..
Marla: D-U-M-B
Teacher: very good. Can you use that word in a sentence?
Marla: Sure, Dave is very DUMB.
Teacher: OK, well can anyone spell the word STUPID?
Marla: I can! I can.
Teacher: OK, go ahead Darla.
Marla: S-T-U-P-I-D
Teacher: Very good. Can you use that word in a sentence?
Marla: Sure,  Dave  is very STUPID.
Teacher: OK, well lets continue, can anyone spell the word DICTATE?

No one raises their hand, so the teacher asks  Dave if he can spell the word DICTATE?

Dave: Sure, D-I-C-T-A-T-E
Teacher: Very good Dave. Can you use that word in a sentence?
Dave: Sure I can. "I may be DUMB and I may be STUPID, but Darla says my DICTATE good."

Have a LOL day!

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Hapit Pa Ko Nalibog

Agoynoy, ang mga tagalog ani karun nakabasa sa title, dautan na dayon ang gihuna huna. Mga berdi jud ug esepan oh! Atoa ning idifferentiate, at least sa tibuok post naku naa sila'y masabtan gamay.

              BISAYA                     TAGALOG                             ENGLISH
              Nalibog                        Nalilito                                   Confused
              Nauwagan                    Nalilibog                                Horny

Unta naklaro jud na sa mga tagalog na nay pagka BERDI ang panghunahuna. Nah, bahak na ni, bago ta mulayo sa topic, mubalik na ta. Hapit pa ko nalibog, bow.

Pero ang tinuod, nahuman na jud kug kalibog. Siguro nakapansin ka (kung nakaanhi na ka sauna) na nalahi na pud ang hitsura sa akong blag. Mao na akung gikalibgan ganina, kung magpabilin ku sa itom o mubalhin ko sa puti. Nalibog pud ko kung himuon ba nakung mas simple o mas kumplikado. Nalibog pud ko kung magpadayon ko sa dating title sa blag. Nalibog pud ku nganong ang mga puti, sigeg bulad, apos ang mga itom, hala kiskis ug papaya sop. Bitaw, sa akong pagkalibog sa daghang butang, nikaon na lang ko sa kusina. Pero pag abot didto, nalibog na pud ko unsa akong kaunon. Shoesmiyosantiman-e, nalilibogan na talaga ako uy. Mao nagdesisyon na lang ko na mudakop ug langaw ug swertehan, nakadakop ko ug usa kabuok! Kay naglagot pa man ko, ang langaw maoy akong gipahimungtan. Una, gitanggalan nako ug duha ka tiil.

Paliiits: Lupad langaw lupad!

Lupad ang langaw. 
Gidakop na pud naku unya gitanggalan ug duha na pud ka tiil, duha na lay bilin.

Paliiits: Lupad langaw, lupad! 

Lupad ang langaw. Kuyawa jud.
Gidakop na pud naku ang langaw unya giibtan naku ug pako. 

Paliiits: Lupad langaw, lupaaaaaad! 

Wa na milupad ang langaw. Natingala ko. 

Paliiits: Lupad langaw, lupaaaaaaaaaaaaad!

Wa jud milupad ang langaw. Ug didto nawala akong kalibog. Karon kabalo na ko. Ang langaw kung tanggalan ug pako, MABUNGOL. Maayong gab-i diha part. Naa moy tuba? n_n

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Sulat Para Kay Edwin

Kumustamos amigos and amigas!
Eto na naman tayo, magkakatuwaan para naman maibsan ang bigat ng atig dinadala sa araw araw. Oo na ate kuya, mayaman na kayo, kung sasabihin mong wala kang dalang mabigat, tanginang yan, ikaw na pinagpala. O sya sya, di ko na hahabaan pa ang litanya, ibabahagi ko lang ang kwento ni tito Walrus.

Handa ka na ba? Pwet, este pwes, basa. (may ganun pa talaga)

Pards, paki translate naman itong sulat galing kay Samantha, penpal ko sa US hindi ko maintindihan yung sulat, english kase. Paki translate lang.

My dearest Edwin,

Pards: Ikaw yun.
Edwin: Oo ako yun.

How I long for your arms.

Pards: Pano daw humaba yung braso mo?
Edwin: Hindi naman mahaba yung braso ko...
Pards: 'E hindi ko alam, yun yung tanong nya.

The first time I saw your picture, I felt happy.

Pards: Nilagare daw nya yung litrato mo. Natuwa daw sya nung nilagare nya..
Edwin: Baket naman???

You have beautiful eyes.

Pards: Pangbabae daw yung mata mo. Ayaw siguro sa pangbabaeng mata kaya nya nilagare...
Edwin: 'E bat kailangan pang lagariin? Pwede namang guntingin nalang...

I lost your picture last week.

Pards: Winala daw nya yung picture..
Edwin: Sana sinoli nalang nya!

But i felt glad when i saw it again.

Pards: Natuwa daw sya nung nilagare nya ulit yung picture.
Edwin: Akala ko ba winala nya?
Pards: Oo nga.. hindi ko din alam.

Even though you wrote me in Filipino, and I didn't understand your letter, I appreciate the thought.

Pards: Kahit Filipino ka daw at hindi sya marunong magbasa, natutuwa sya na nag-iisip ka.
Edwin: Hindi sya marunong magbasa? Tingin nya sa mga Pilipino hindi nag-iisip?
Pards: Siguro...

I hope you can send me more pictures.

Pards: Padalahan mo daw sya ng litrato ng sigarilyo
Edwin: Baket???
Pards: Ewan ko.. yung "More" daw.

I'm sure you won't mind? :)

Pards: Sigurado daw syang hindi ka nag-iisip. May smile pa...
Edwin: Loko pala yan 'e!
Pards: Oo nga.
Edwin: Pards, paki sulatan nga... sabihin mo lang na hindi ko na babasahin ang mga sulat nya, At hindi na din ako magsusulat sakanya! At paalam na sakanya!
Pards: Sige sige.

Dear Samantha,

I am no read, no write.

Babay to you,

Ang saklap ng lab istori ni pareng Edwin.

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Hinahanaphanap Kita

Kita nyo naman, drama ang pamagat. Siyempre, tao lang din ako, nasasaktan din (asus!). Pero yun nga lang, di ko masyadong pinapatagal ang mga ganung damdamin. Sino ba naman ang may gustong araw araw nasasaktan.

Bueno, bago pa mapunta ng Mexico ang usapan, balik tayo sa main topic. Noong medyo bata pa ako, may nakilala akong isang paslit. Palaboy lang sya sa daan. Payat, medyo kokonti lang ang buhok, ngunit may napakaamong mukha. Kaya nung minsang nagkasalubong kami ay agad ko siyang kinausap. Tinanong ko kung asan na ang mga magulang niya, kung san sya nakatira, kung sino ang kasama niya, at kung anou ano pa. Binigyan ko rin siya ng tinapay dahil halatang gutom na ito. Kinuwento nya sa'kin ang kanyang buhay. Ang alam nya daw eh patay na ang mga magulang niya.

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Lumang Kwento

Kung isa ka sa mga batang 90's, siguro'y alam mo yung joke na to.

May tatlong nagkasala sa tribo. Syempre, kasi nga 90's ang joke naten, eh sina Juan, Pedro, at Berto ang ating mga bida. Pinatawag sila ng Tribal Chieftain.

Chief: Kayo tatlo kuha tig sampu prutas tapos kayo balik. Ako may pagawa sa inyo, pag tagumpay, kayo uwi.

Bumalik kagad si Juan, may dalang sampung santol.

Chief: Pasok mo lahat santol sa pwet mo. Pag ikaw ngiwi, hikbi, o ngiti, ikaw patay.

Unang santol pa lang si Juan ay napa-ngiwi na kagad. Patay. Dumating si Pedro at may dalang sampung ubas. Nasa pang sampung ubas na si Pedro nang bigla siyang napangiti. Patay.

Nagkita ang dalawa sa purgatoryo.

Juan: Buhay ka pa sana kung di ka ngumiti, isa na lang yun eh. Ba't ka ba ngumiti?
Pedro: Nakita ko kasi si Berto, may dalang DURIAN.


Hanggang ngayon ay napapangiti pa rin ako ng joke na 'to. Napapangiwi rin ako sa twing iisipin ko ang pagpasok ng DURIAN sa pwetan mo. Yay.

Ito naman ay hindi para mawalan kayo ng gana sa pagkain. Sana lang, sa pagiging moderno ng ating bansa ay huwag naman nating kalimutan ang ating nakaraan. Sa panahon ngayon, ano na ba nagpapatawa sa'tin? Just for Laughs? Just Kidding? Pati nga Wow Mali eh yung mga video na ng dayuhan ang ginagamit. Ayos lang ang umasenso, wag mo lang kakalimutang lumingon. Sabi nga kasi ni Aling Tessie, "Ang di lumingon sa pinanggalingan, may pinagkakautangan,".

Magandang hapon hipon! n_n

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Mga Bakit ng Aking Buhay

Bakit ba tinawag na blackmail?

Eh di naman sya black, at lalong di rin sya mail.

Bakit ba naging bahaghari?
Di naman bahag, dehins ding hari.

Bakit ba naging eggplant?
Plant nga, di naman egg.

Bakit sugar mommy?
Mommy nga, pero sugar ba?

Bakit ba naging starfish?
Dehins namang star, at lalong di rin fish.

Bakit ba tinawag na building?
Eh tapos na ngang gawin.

Bakit ba naging toothpaste?
Di naman tooth, di rin paste.

Bakit tinawag na butterfly?
Nakaka-fly nga, pero butter ba?

Bakit ang manok kung kelan kinalbo
dun pa tinatawag na dressed chicken?
Nagjojoke ba nagpauso nito?

Bakit mo to binabasa?
May natututunan ka ba?

PS. Bakit yung ulo ni Kuya Kim bihirang makita?

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Palakaibigang Paalala (Friendly Reminder) Para sa Araw ng mga Puso

Bukas! Oye bukas, Valentine's day na. Maraming date mangyayari. Mag syota, mag asawa, magkakamag-anak, magkapit-bahay, magkababata, magkaibigan, magka-FB, magkalaro sa DOTA, oy teka, magka-FB?!? Oye, kasi sa panahon ngayon, uso na maghanap ng syota sa Facebook, may iba pa nga e, di pa nagkikita sa personal e makikita mo nang naka-married na, talaga naman. Ano kasunod nang pagiging close sa isang taong nakilala mo lang sa internet? Siyempre, ang paborito ng mahaharot, EYEBALL. Kuuuu, sarap tanggalan ng eyeball.

Dahil bukas e araw na nga daw ng mga puso, gusto ko lang magpaalala. Delikado ang makipagkita sa isang taong nakilala mo lang sa internet, lalo na kung babae ka. Pero di ibig sabihin nun e safe na tayong mga barako. May mga nae-FB din kasing mga barako na nagtatago sa likod ng isang magandang larawan ng dilag, yay, nakakatakot yun. Pero pokus muna tayo sa mga babaeng karaniwang nadadale. Payo ko lang, lalo na dun sa mga batang babaeng nasa high school pa lang at pababa, wag na wag kayong papayag na makipag-meet nang kayong dalawa lang nung taong nakilala mo lang sa chat o fb. Kung di mo mapigilan ang tibok ng iyong kaharutan, marapating magdala ng kasama. Wag pupunta sa lugar na wala masyadong tao, the more, the many-er sabi ng Mang Inasal. Maganda rin yung ideyang papiktyur kayo sa friend mo, para malaman kung anong hitsura nang huli mong nakasama kung sakaling may mangyaring wala sa script. Tama si Uncle Walrus, sa Araw ng mga Puso, di sapat ang paalalang, "Hoy KONTING ingat,". Mas maganda kung MADAMI. Hindi rin daw excuse kung hindi ka na bata, dahil sa panahon ngayon, di mo na mabibilang ang mga halang ang kaluluwang gumagala at nagpapanggap na tao.

Bukod sa mga nasabi ko sa taas, pinakamainam pa ring sandata sa sakuna ang "pagiging hindi tanga".

Oge, basta bukas mga tolongges, madaming ingat lang kung san man kayo pupunta. Gandang gabi.


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Ano Sa'yo ang Valentine's Day?

Hello imaginary readers. Malapit na ang balentayms, at lahat ng napupuntahan kong blog ay may mga posts nang patungkol dito. Ako na lang ata ang napag-iwanan, kaya eto na, eto na nga.

Pero bago ang before anything else, lahat ba kayo e alam kung ano talaga yung V-day? Naks, bilis nakapag-open new tab ni tita at tito, hahanapin yan sa Google. Aysus, ayos lang yan, ganyan din naman ako e.

Sabi ni tita Wiki P.:

Saint Valentine's Day, commonly shortened to Valentine's Day, is a holiday observed on February 14 honoring one or more early Christian martyrs named Saint Valentine. It is traditionally a day on which lovers express their love for each other by presenting flowers, offering confectionery, and sending greeting cards (known as "valentines"). The day first became associated with romantic love in the circle of Geoffrey Chaucer in the High Middle Ages, when the tradition of courtly love flourished. It was first established by Pope Gelasius I in 496 AD, and was later deleted from the General Roman Calendar of saints in 1969 by Pope Paul VI.
Modern Valentine's Day symbols include the heart-shaped outline, doves, and the figure of the winged Cupid. Since the 19th century, handwritten valentines have given way to mass-produced greeting cards.

O diba, holy sya? Para din syang Christmas, All Saints' Day, All Souls Day, Holy Week, at kung anu ano pa. Banal diba? Pero ang hirap sa iba saten e binabalbal ang kabanalan ng araw na ito.

Uso sa Facebook status at Tweeter tweets yung mga linyang nagrereklamo dahil wala daw date sa Valentine's Day, mga nagpapapansin para alukin ng date, mga bitter bitteran kasi napunta na sa iba yung dati nilang kasama nung nagdaang V-day, mga nag-aalok na maging ka-date at haynakunaku ewan ko na lang, dami e, try mo hanap sa FB nyan, andami.

Problema kasi, isinasara ng iba yung utak nila at tinutuon lang sa kaisipang ang Valentine's day ay para lang sa magsing-irog. Namaaaaaan, nakakahiya ka kung ganun ka mag isip. E ano ngayon kung wala kang syota? wala kang ka-date na gwapo o maganda? walang magbibigay ng flowers at chocolates? walang magpapakain sa'yo ng kwek-kwek? Di mo naman yan ikamamatay kung wala kang ganyan e. Lawakan ang isipan, andyan ang pamilya mo. E kung si Nanay na lang bigyan mo ng roses, wag na chocolates dahil delikado sa diabetes. Ibili mo nang sandamakmak na isaw ang mga kapatid mo. Tumagay kasama si Itay. I-date ang buong pamilya, di ka pa mamomroblema kasi di mo na kelangan pang magpa-pogi o magpaganda, kasi para sa kanila, ikaw na, the best ka. Paalala lang din, ang Araw ng mga Puso ay paggunita sa mga martyr na Valentine, (e.g V1, V2, V3, basta madami sila), sana'y hindi lang sa araw na 'to tayo maging "loving", mas maganda kung aaraw arawin natin to. Sabi nga nung isang TV station na di ko na lang sasabihing GMA, araw-arawin ang pasko. Dito, mangangahas akong sabihing, "Sana'y araw arawin din natin ang Valentine's day".


Nakita ko lang tong litratong to.

Kahit sa mahalay na paraan, naipapakita dito na pwede rin tayong maging masaya sa Araw ng mga Puso kahit mag-isa. Good day!


There is no friendship, no love, like that of the family. - Henry Ward Beecher

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Opinyon Mo, Opinyon Ko

Buenas noches tolongges!

Di ko na muna kayo kakamustahin dahil in my opinion, ganun parin kayo tulad ng kahapon, lamang nga lang ng isang paligo ang iba. Uuuuy, maliligo na yan, asus, nahiya ka pa friend.

Kakarating ko nga lang pala mula sa isang "enlightenment" session. Ayoko talaga sanang pumunta kaso nahihiya akong tumanggi e, ngayon lang kaya ako kinausap ni ate, tapos tatanggihan ko pa yung alok niya. Naisip ko talaga, ganun na ba talaga ako kaitim at kailangan na ng "enlightenment". Anyhow kalabaw, hindi yung "religious recruitment" ang topic natin ngayon, kaya balik tayo sa opinyon.

Ang opinion na kung tawagin sa tagalog ay opinyon o palagay ay isang paniniwalang naaayon sa ating mga kuro-kuro at ito'y resulta ng ating emosyon at pagkakaintindi ng katotohanan. Dahil sa opinyon, ipinanganak ang argumento. So ngayon masasabi nating ang mga magulang ni Ginoong Argumento ay sina Ginoo at Ginang Opinyon, maliwanag? Dahil sa opinyon, maraming buhay ang nalagas, maraming nawalan ng tahanan, nawalan ng asawa, nawalan ng hanap buhay, nawalan ng kapit-bahay, nawalan ng virginity, at meron ding walang wala na eh nawalan pa nang dahil sa opinyon. Pero hindi naman ibig sabihin nun ay masama ang opinyon, dahil marami ring nagkaron nang dahil sa opinyon. Tanungin mo ang mga call center agents ng Opinionology.

Nung elementary, lagi kong naririnig sa mga naging titser ko ang mga tanong na pinangungunahan ng, "In your own opinion....,". Naalala ko, nung minsang tinanong ako ng, "In your own opinion, why did Lapu lapu killed Magellan?", sagot ko naman, "Because Lapu lapu cannot understand him mam", ayun, tawanan buong klase. Pero siyempre ako ang bida, pinagtanggol ako ni mam, kasi nga raw, "WALANG MALING OPINION".

Sa palagay mo, tama kaya si mam?

Nang dahil dun, lumaki akong naniniwala sa sarili at handang panindigan ang mga binibitawan kong opinyon. Kayo ba, hanggang san nyo ba kayang panindigan ang mga binibitiwan ninyong kuro kuro o palagay? Kaya mo bang sumalungat sa opinyon ng karamihan? O magbibihis kalabaw ka na lang din tulad nila?

Bago kumain eh magiiwan ako ng opinyong bahala na kayo kung papatulan nyo o palalampasin na lang. In my own opinion, all of your opinions are wrong.

Tara kain. n_n

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People of the Philippines vs Troll Ahcee

Kumusta naman ang pwet nyo? Pwet pa rin ba? n_n

Anyway my way, ilang araw na rin mula nung unang pumutok sa internet ang kontrobersyal na kumento ng isang Ahcee patungkol sa mga bisaya nating kababayan. Anak ng, trending sya pre, maraming salamat sa mga "feeders". Iba't ibang pangalan at litrato ang naglabasan sa na nagsasabing siya ang tunay na Ahcee. Siyempre, tayong mga Pinoy naman eh di madamot, kaya libu libong "shares" din ang nangyari. May mga pangalang Althea, Gladys, Roberto, Juan, Severo, haynakunaku. Iba iba din yung mga litrato, may mukang bisaya, may mukang tagalog, mukang alien, mukang cartoon character, mukang ikaw, haygulogulo. Kaya wag ka nang mabigla kung isang araw eh kumakalat na rin sa internet ang picture mo at may nakasulat na "Ang tunay na Ahcee Flores", hala.

Sa totoo lang, hindi ko rin talaga kilala si Ahcee. We're not close you know. Hindi rin kami open. Kayo ba, kilala nyo sya? Weh? Di nga? Kwento ka naman my friend.

Maganda sanang idulog ito sa Congress nang maimbestigahan kasi nga di ba, kung makapag file sila ng impeachment ay ora ora. Pero duda kasi ako eh, baka pumalpak din sila, at lalong matagalan, kaya sa DOG oDepartment of Google na lang ako dumulog, at salamat naman, matapos ang 0.11 seconds aay binigyan ako ng 37,600,000 resulta sa pagbanggit ko pa lang sa pangalang Ahcee Flores, at siguro naman ay hinihingal na kayo kasi nga hindi pa ko gumagamit ng tuldok sa dami na nang nasabi ko, sorrrrryyyy. Pero in fairness, salamat sa mabilis pa sa kidlat na resulta ng imbestigasyon ng DOG, malamang magkaka-anak na si Pnoy ay matatapos rin ang pagtuklas sa tunay na katauhan ng ating mistery searchee number 1, Ahcee, yuhooo!

Ibabahagi ko sa inyo ang opinyon ko patungkol sa isyung ito. Di ko hinuhusgahan si Ahcee, kasi di ko rin alam kung siya nga ang nag post ng mga yun. Kayo, alam nyo na ba? Siguro naman hindi kayo ipinanganak kahapon para di nyo maintindihan 'to: "On the internet, you can be the president, or even God, without the people knowing that you're just a dog,". It's not that I'm siding with that dog ha, bisaya din kaya ang inyong lingkod. Naaawa lang kasi ako sa mga taong tinuturo at pinagbabantaan, di lang isa, kundi marami sila. Malay nyo, ako yun. Joke joke joke.

Ang tawag daw sa mga ganyan ay "troll" at yung ginagawa nila "trolling". Ayon kay Maribeth Oliver ng Web Safety PH site, isang partner ng Yahoo! Safely, trolls like to:

• Spread rumors (for example, a noted person dying)
• Gossip about celebrities (celebrity A is gay or having an affair)
• Assume the identity of other users
• Attack people and entities under the guise of their “right to free speech”
• Bully people who can’t fight back including celebrities, politicians and other prominent people who know it’s self-defeating to engage in a cyberwar with a troll.

May mga payo din si Maribeth kung pano mo mapoprotektahan ang iyong sarili sa mga taong ganito.

• Do Not FEED the troll. Keep cool. Don’t reply.
• Ask your friends not to reply to a troll.
• Block a troll, flag the offensive comment or report him or her to the site administrator. If the troll shows up under another account name, block him again
• On your social account or your blog, adjust privacy settings moderate comments, or disallow comments, to keep them out.

O, sana naman may nai-share ako sa inyong "maliwanag". Pero kung magagalit kayo sa'ken kasi di ako nakikiisa sa inyo, bahala na kayo dyan.

PS. sa ginagawa ninyong pagpansin sa taong ganyan, paggawa ng pages "dedicated" to them, pag share ng pictures na di naman sigurado, palagay ko, di na kayo nalalayo kay Ahcee.

Good day.

Tingin ko, eto yung tunay na itsura ni Ahcee. n_n

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Pag-ibig Na Nga Ba? O Papogi lang?

Usap usapan na naman sa tibilisyon ang isang ligawang nagaganap. Akalain mong mas patok pa ang balitang to kesa sa nagaganap na moro-moro sa impeachment court. Araw araw, may update. Araw araw may pasabog. Sa kakapanuod ko ng news, may napapansin na tuloy ako sa diumanoy "umuusbong na pag-iibigan".

Naging laman ng tibilisyon, dyaryo, radyo, kumpulan sa kanto, labahan sa may ilog ang pagde-date daw ni Grace Lee at ni Pnoy. Mas tumindi pa talaga to nung nagkaaminan na na lumalabas sila. Natawa nga ako minsan nung sinabi ni Grace Lee na,

I don’t know about calling everyday, I don’t wanna divulge too much details, pero yes very normal, like any normal guy.”

Ano pumasok sa isip nyo? Sa pagkakasabi e parang iniexpect ng karamihan na abnormal si Mr. President. Heeeeeheeee. Peace.

Anyhow inihaw, ano nga ba talaga magiging papel ni Grace Lee? Girlfriend o bagong spokesperson? Ang dami niya kasing binibitiwang statements na para bang binibigyan niya ng make-over ang presidente, kaya naisip ko, baka siya na ang papalit kay Edwin Lacierda. Naknang!

Kayo kaya, ano masasabi nyo? Eto yung mga sinabi ni Grace.

We’re still at the stage of getting to know each other.”

Matapos ang ilang date.

He’s brilliant, he is the most intelligent man I’ve met in my life.”

Pero eto ang nakakatakot.

Whatever we talk about — whether politics, economics, books or music — he’s so knowledgeable. He knows a lot. Whenever some critics say bad things about him, that he’s not aggressive or that he’s not matalino, I’d debate them and tell them he’s very smart.”

Anak ng tinapay, magagamit ng Pilipinas yung katalinuhang ibinahagi ni Mr. President kay Grace, kahit yung patungkol lang sa ekonomiya natin.

Ang tumatakbo sa isip ko ngayon? Dalawang katanungan lang naman. Totoo na nga ba ang pag-iibigang ito?

O baka diversion lang si Grace Lee para matakpan ang pumapangit na imahe ng pangulo? Magkaganun man, "it wouldn't be the first time that Pnoy and his cohorts are using someone to get media mileage".

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Work Experience

Helo kalbo!
Kumusta naman ang buhay buhay mga mam at ser? Eh ang trabaho, how's it going? (naks ingglesero). Ibabahagi ko lang sa inyo ang mga di ko malimot limot na mga karanasan sa iba't ibang trabahong aking pinasukan.


Dishwasher sa isang restaurant. First day of work.
Supervisor: Mr. Balason, wag ka nang babalik bukas. Bumubula ang sabaw ng customer dahil sa sabon. (Saklap!)


Tutor sa isang tutorial center.

Student: Ser naman, science lang ang exam bukas, madali lang yun.
Paliiits: Madali? Alam mo ba ano english ng atay?
Student: HEART! (Tanginang bata, private pa naman yung pinapasukan).

Nung nakuha ko na ang mga teknik ng pagiging tutor, I decided to leave the tutorial center at nagsimulang tumanggap ng HOME SERVICE TUTORIALS (pagkatapos ng matiyagang pama-mirate ng mga dating customers ng pinapasukan kong tutorial center syempre). Di ko malilimutan yung mag inang Korean.

Korean mother: I'll go to shopping okay?
Paliiits: Okay ma'am.
Korean Mother: Okay, when time is 12 o'clock, you eat my daughter okay?

SHAKS! Napatango na lang ako at napatingin sa anak nyang 3rd year highschool lang.


Syempre umasenso, ininvade ni palito ang maugang upuan ng isang call center agent, at isinuot ang mabahong headphones.

Paliiits: Good day sir, I am-
Customer: You woke me up in the middle of the night just to say good day? You fuck! It's Sunday and- (hung up)

Paliiits: May I know if you're single, married or widowed?
Customer: Oh no young man, you're voice sounds too young for me, hihihi.
Nagkamali sya ng akala, para daw kasi akong nang aakit kung magsalita. Namaaaaaan.

Paliiits: Our New York office sir is--
Customer: Wait wait, you said New York? You're kidding right? He-he
Paliiits: No I'm not sir, actually--
Customer: Oh I see. I'm from Las Vegas.
Medyo tanga eh noh? Pero medyo lang.

Customer: I'm widowed.
Paliiits: That's great.

PAliiits: Thank you for calling *tooooot. How may I help you today?
Customer: I am sending you bomb. Ha-ha-ha.

Paliiits: Thank you for calling--
Customer: Cut the crap, just bring us the pizza at the Playboy mansion.

Customer: You're selling shit.
Paliiits: Sir, if you're not completely satisfied with our product, remember that a little disappointment is good for building character.

Mahirap talaga magtrabaho. Pero masaya. Lalo na kung hahaluan mo ng konting katangahan. Good day! n_n

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Hi! Ho! Lie low!

Di ko sinasadyang magpost ng entry ngayon. Wala kasi akong magawa, ang dami ko pang iniisip (kelan ba naging konti?). Sa dami ng iniisip eh binabaha na ang utak ko, wala kasing drainage e. And dami kong gustong ilabas, pero wala akong mapaglabasan. Nakakapagod din talaga kasi kung mag isa ka lang, mas maganda talaga kung may kasama, lalo na kung dalawa n_n

Hep hep, joke joke joke. May nag iisip ng green oh, tsk. Matagal din pala akong nawala dito, hoy blog, miss mo ko? miss mo ko? Nangyari kasi, nasira ang notbuk ko, kaya pasensya na. Bigla bigla na lang kasing nahinto sa Welcome Screen, di nagboboot up ng dire diretso. Buti na lang at nasolusyunan rin na bunga ng makati kong utak at mapaglaro kong mga kamay. Tutal andito na lang naman ako, ibabahagi ko na lang ang trabol shooting na ginawa ko nang sa gayun ay magkaroon naman ng laman ang post kong ito.

If your Windows 7 always get stuck on the Welcome Screen or if you cannot proceed to the login screen or if you have this "Black Screen of Death", Go to Safe Mode>press Start and type "msconfig"> Hit Enter> Press Services tab> Check Hide all> click Disable all> Restart if prompted.

After restarting, Press Start again> type "msconfig" again without quotations> click Services tab> enable one or two start up services then reboot again. Continue this process until you find out what service is causing the problem.

Ang linaw ko di ba? Good day. n_n

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Language Barrier

Kasalukuyang nangyayari sa bilabed Pilipins.

"Manong, nanonood ba kayo ng impeachment trial sa tibilisyon?"
"Hindi na, di rin naman namin naiintindihan eh, puro sila inglis."


"Kuya, alam mo ba ano ibig sabihin ng impeachment?"
"Oo, yun yung ii-impeach mo si Corona. Tama, yun nga."


James Soriano: "We used to think learning Filipino was important because it was practical: Filipino was the language of the world outside the classroom. It was the language of the streets: it was how you spoke to the tindera when you went to the tindahan, what you used to tell your katulong that you had an utos, and how you texted manong when you needed “sundo na.”"


"Kung ayaw mo maholdap sa jeep, wag na wag kang mag iinglis."


Ang hirap yes? Tingin nyo, kung inglis lang ang wika ng lahat, natapos kaya ang Tower of Babel? Makatarungan ba ang ginawa ng Bathala na pag iba ibahin ang wika nang sa gayun ay di daw umabot sa pintuan nya ang tuktok ng tore ng Babel? Ikaw, pano ka magsalita? n_n

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Piyesta ng Itim na Nazareno

December 25, Christmas.
January 1, New Year.
January 9, let's get ready to rambooooooooooool!

What's with the Black Nazarene? May Negrong Kristo ba talaga? Alamin natin ang kasaysayan. Ayon kay Uncle Google, andun daw kay Tita Wiki ang history. Kaya tinanong ko si Tita Wiki and here's the answer:

The Black Nazarene, known to devotees in Spanish as Nuestro Padre JesĂșs Nazareno (abbreviated as NPJN, Filipino: Mahal na Itim na Nazareno, English: Our Father Jesus Nazarene) is a life-sized, dark-coloured, wooden sculpture of Jesus Christ carrying the cross, believed to be miraculous by many Filipino Catholics. The statue was carved by an anonymous carpenter in Acapulco. Originally fair or light-complexioned, it turned dark after it was exposed to fire on its arrival from Mexico.

Kamangha mangha nga naman. Kung sa boxing, bugbog sarado sa ating mga Pinoy ang mga taga Mexico, pero pagdating dito, samba to the highest level si Juan. Kung ang mga puti din sa Amerika ay dinediskrimineyt ang mga niggahs, naku, ibahin mo sa Pilipinas dahil dito, panatiko si Juan at Juana sa negro.

Wow sabaw. Isipin mo na lang anong masasabi ng mga neo-Nazi sa ating mga Pinoy nyan. Kung sabagay, marami namang napapasaya ang kapistahang ito dahil nga walang pasok sa eskwela, walang signal, walang kostumer ang mga tindahan, at walang trapik. Nasambit pa nga ng isang porenjer, "It's more fun in the Philippines because there's no signal.". Naks naman, I'm proud to be Pinoy.

Tuwing kapistahan din ng Poong Nazareno mo rin makikita na ang iba't ibang sikat na COLOR GROUP.
1. Partido Liberal - sila yung mga naka-yellow nakasakay sa karo kasama ang estatwa ng Itim na Nazareno.

2. Maroon 5 - sila naman yung mga debotong nakasunod sa karo, naglululundag para makasakay, humihila at nag aagawan sa lubid, nagsisigawan, nandudukot ng wallet, nang aagaw ng cellphone, nambubugbog (sigaw ng mga to, "Bubugbugin namin yan, bubugbugin namin yan! Isa lang!"). Aba talaga naman, nabigla ako, kala ko ba sagrado ang okasyong ito. It really is fun in the Philippines.

3. Plain White T's - eto naman ang majority ng madlang pipol ni Kuya Kim.

4. Color Me Bad - sila na yung mga di na nakisabay sa usong kulay ng tatlo sa taas. May mga snatcher ding humahalo dito, nagsusuot ng iba't ibang kulay ng damit para di kagad mahuli pagkatapos makagawa ng krimen.

5. Black Nazarene - siyempre pa, kung wala siya, ano pa silbi ng pagdadambahan, pagtatapakan, pagsasakitan nila?

Magkagayunpaman, kahit na iba iba ang kulay ng mga damit nila, there's one thing that is common to this devotees and fanatics, at makikita mo yan sa litrato sa baba.

Biro lang. Siyempre di lang yun ang nag iisang bagay na magkapareho sila, malamang lahat din sila ay nagkakaisa sa isang goal: ang makahipo. Sa Poon. Di ko nga lubos maisip bakit after makahipo o makapahid e para bang, "Yes, pwede na akong mamatay!", ang maaaninag mo sa kanila. Tignan mo si ate, matapos nyang maipahid ang bimpo e wala na syang pakialam kung may sasalo ba o wala.

Kung nanonood kayo ng news sa TB, makikita nyo na di basta basta ang sinasapit ng mga deboto. Di ko lang talaga maintindihan e, kung bakit kailangan pang magkasakitan. Ganun ba ka-strikto si Papa God, na kung sinong malakas, sinung magaling sa tapakan, sikuhan, siya yung ultimate champion? Ba't ba kailangang mag-paa? Nasa Bibliya ba na dapat mamatayan ka muna ng kuko sa paa kada ika siyam ng Enero para wish granted?

Talaga nga namang it's more fun in the Philippines. Di pa nawawala ang smog dala ng goodbye Philippines, ayun si Juan, nakipagdambahan at nakipagsikuhan na sa Quiapo.

Onga pala, wala ako dun. Ikaw?

DISCLAIMER: This entry DOES NOT mean to desecrate the holiness believed by many. Ang mga nakasulat po dito ay opinion na ninais ko mang itago sa isipan ko'y di ko magawa ng matagalan. Kaya eto, di pa lumilipas ang isang araw, e sinulat ko na.

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Long Distance Relationship Tips and Tricks Part 2

Hello there heavyweighter, I'm back to fulfill my balak. Di ko man diretsahang sinabing may part two ang previous enrty ko, eto na, eto na, eto na, waaaaaaaa, doobidoo bidoo, bidooo bidooo. Tedeng!

1. Password Mo, Share Mo
Eto na, ang pinakamahirap na trick para sa mahaharot sa social network, bwahaaaaa! Kung wala kang tinatago, allow your partner access to your emails, networking accounts etsetera etsetera ulet. This brings the suspicion level lower. Ang totoo kasi nyan, kahit na hanngang langit ang tiwala mo, there will always be times of suspicion (o wag magdedeny, aminiiiin). If you're going to give your labidabs the password, be sure that they don't abuse the right to access your accounts and that they appreciate you giving the information. If, for some reason, hindi nyo feel na bigyan si labidabs ng access, at least try to do a screen-share and take them for a quick "hey-look-I'm-not-doing-anything-bad" tour. Pero mas mainam pa rin yung sharing of passwords, like us, haaaaa. Sharing of passwords also gives ease to your partner in a way na makikita nila kung nare-recieve mo ba yung email nila, kung binabasa mo ba to, or just check if you're active when you're away from them. Pero ingat din, kung di mo maisheshare yung password mo, tell them, and ayusin mo ang pag explain, dahil maraming katanungan ang ipapanganak sa araw na yun, bwahaaaaaa. (there could also be infos din kasi na personal na at delikado pag nakalabas, just like R and J scandal, isa yun. o baka wanted si bf mo, mahirap yun)

Normal lang na medyo reluctant ka na ishare ang pasword mo sa partner mo kasi baka suyurin nya lahat ng messages mo, yes? Kung ganun, give your partner at least "temporary access" to your account every now and then. Even better, go through it together, palitan ng password. Kung wala ka namang iha-hide, then prove it and DO NOT LIE OR DELETE THINGS. Isa pa, pag nakatanngap ka ng message that has nothing to do with your fault (Example: An email from someone flirting with you, or a suggestive picture sent by someone else that you never requested.) tapos nakita ni partner, naku, be sure to EXPLAIN. The last thing you want is your partner jumping to conclusions about you. Mas mainam din na iexplain mo sa kanya yung email before nya makita. You can do this by saying something such as: "Hey Dude, pag nakita mo yung email ni Pokwang, wala yun, sweet lang talaga yun sa lahat ng kaibigan nya." or "Mahal, nagsend si Betong ng pics sa'kin, kuha nung nag beach sila, kaya pag may nakita kang pics ng mga chics dun na naka two piece, wala akong paki dun, nagyayabang lang sya sa mga chic na di nya naman nakuha, he he he.". Along with an explanation, you can also choose to go further to make your partner feel better, such as blocking someone who sends annoying emails (such as flirty ones) or deleting any pictures that you don't need (such as suggestive ones sent by a girl or boy who just wants attention). But if you are going to give your partner your password, then set up rules and regulations for them. Bibigyan ko kayo:

1. They won't delete, change, or manipulate your account nang di mo pinahihintulutan.
2. They won't reply or answer any messages posing as you, again, nang di mo pinahihintulutan.
3. They won't use your account against you kung sakali mang mag break kayo (wag naman sana, horror yun).
4. They won't harass you or jump to conclusions about anything they find without an explanation from you first.
5. They won't delete, change, or manipulate anything inside your account without permission.
6. They will not abuse their right to your password in any way.
7. Eto pinaka importante, they will appreciate the fact that you gave them access to your account.

Pag ito di nila sinunod, abay ano pa ba, revoke na kagad ang right to access. Also, it may only be fair to give your passwords (or share your account in any way) if they have given theirs. Otherwise they may feel as if you have something to hide.

2. Build a Future
Ehem, eto yung isa sa pinaka paborito kong gawin,day dreaming, bang! Haaaa. Seryoso, since di nyo makasama ang isa't isa for the time being, give each other something to look forward to when you finally are together. Set up a future plan or just discuss it with your partner. Mas exciting, mas maganda. Talk about things like what you'll do the first day you're together again, where you'll live, what you'll do when you're out, your future family, etsetera etsetera. Tulad ko, bigla bigla e yumaman at naging ambisyoso ang utak ko, kaya bigla bigla na lang din na open up ko kay Sarah, "Dude, let's go to Las Vegas.", haaaaa. Na rewind pa, "Dude, attend tayo ng gig one time na tayong apat, ako, ikaw and the two kids.", nyeeeheee. If you two visit each other more than once a year or just live a few hours apart, discuss fun activities to do and make something new for each time you're together. Make it something to look forward to and that you'll never forget! (wag nyo isiping PMS ang sina suggest ko ha, loko, haaaaa)

3. Problema Nyo, Ayusin Nyo, and SOLVE THEM RIGHT!
Importante din to. Kung may problema kayo o misunderstandings, keep it within the relationship. Problems should be solved together as a couple, kasi nga, kayong dalawa yung involve. Kung may ibang tao man, like may pinagseselosan si labidabs, wag nyo na isali yun, dahil pag nag confide ka pa dun sa pinagseselosan, abay di na kayo couple nya, triple na, lab trayanggol ba? Haaaaa. Also, it is too easy to tell your friends about what's going on and be influenced by them (lalo na yung mga NEGRA este NEGA mong friends) while you're in a bad mood. Di ko naman sinasabing wag ka ng tumakbo sa mga friends mo, ang akin lang, wag namang lagi lagi. If you talk to your friends first about every problem then hahantong ka lang sa mas malala pang sitwasyon dahil:
1. Mas lalong maa-upset si labidabs because you are letting people IN on personal matters within the relationship.
2. Maiimpluwensyahan ka ng negative na mga advice kasi nga you're in a bad mood.
3. Jumping to conclusions because you have not talked to your partner first, so pwede mong mamisunderstand ang issue at hand.
4. Giving your friends or family a bad impression of your partner.
5. Appearing weak or unwilling to work things out with your partner, delikado yan.
6. And lastly, mas lalaki lang ang tension between the two of you, at pag ang tension, ayon sa Physics 1 ko, ay di na kinaya ng isang string, boom, mapuputol yun.

Para maiwasan yung pagbubuhos ng sama ng loob sa family or sa friends na pwedeng makasira sa image ni labidabs, choose an alternative. One very good way to let out your feelings is to make a journal. This way, you can look back and analyze your feelings further or share it with your partner so they can understand how you feel. Ito yung ginagawa ko eh, and promise mga mam at ser, epektibo sya. Isa pa, tingnan mo rin kung anong magagawa mo sa sarili mo regarding sa issue and whether you can make changes immediately to help. DO NOT always put the blame on your partner. Look at yourself and realize your own faults, BUT DO NOT put the blame entirely on yourself either. Nalito ka ba? Intindihin mo lang, madali lang yan. Napagtanto ko kasi na it's really best that both people take fault for whatever problem that arises, and that you both realize your personal faults and how to avoid it in the future. Huwag nyong hayaang lulutang lutang na parang yellow submarine sa dagat ang isyu mga laberds! Solve them as soon as possible! But DO give yourselves time para mag meditate sa issue. Finally, don't assume anything or take action before TALKING TO YOUR PARTNER ABOUT THE PROBLEM FIRST. Peksman mamatay pa si Spiderman pre, magsisisi ka.

4. Involvement
Try to show interest and help out in your partner's life. May sikreto ako na sa ilang milli seconds ay di na sikreto. Ako ang number one fan ni Sarah. Heeeee :D Getting involved with their life adds an extra element to the relationship in which you two can work together and learn about each other. This can be done through even small things, tulad nung sa amin, araw araw under the burning sun, under the crying skies pare, sinasamahan ko si Sarah sa lahat ng lakad nya nung nag aasikaso pa lang sya ng papeles nya para makalipad papuntang Saudi. Dahil nga dun e natanong na ng tita nya kung pati ba daw ako e mag aabroad na. Uhaw, init, pagod, gutom, puyat, nakisali ako sa lahat ng yun. So if you just think about it, kung kayo ng jowaers mo yun, wasn't that great? At pagdating ng panahon, nakadapa ka na sa kama, nasa Saudi na sya, nagtatype ka ng entry for your blog, magbabalik tanaw ka, ang sarap ng feeling, na naiisip mong, during those times, she wasn't alone, you were there. O di ba, ang sweeeeet, nyeheeee.

5. Don't Just Be a Part of Each Other's Lives—Change Them
Marami sa mga relationships ngayon e yung puro labidabi conversations lang and nothing more. Why not try tinapay? Joke. Strive to make a positive change in each other's lives, wag yung parang device of affection ka lang, ano ka, tau-tauhan ng isang pre schooler? Making an effort to better your partner and yourself creates a stronger bond between both of you and will help in the long run. You can make changes to their lives in many ways. Example ulet tayo, sa akin ulet, wag ka nang umepal, buhay ko yung alam ko e. Dati kasi, walang pakundangan ako sa pag inom. Yung bisyo ko, madali lang, ABCD lang. Alak, Babae, Cigarettes, Droga. Dun sa babae, di masyado, di naman ako kagandahang lalake e. Patapon ako nun, parang wala nang bukas kung maka inom. Parang mauupos ang pipe kung maka hit. Pero lahat yun nabago nung dumating si Sarah sa buhay ko. Natatak sa isipan ko, "Mabubuhay ako ng matagal para sa'yo.", naks naman. Ano kasi yan e, if you're going to make your lives better, it'll be good for the both of you din. When both of your lives are good and happy, your relationship will be as well. Finally, prompt your partner to help change your life by simply asking for their support.

6. Always Be A Friend
Hindi porke mag jowaers na kayo e pwede nyo nang paliparin palabas ng bintana ang friendship nyo! Don't just be lovers, be friends with each other. Don't rid yourselves of friendly ways or hobbies. Always keep a strong friendship within the relationship. Sa amin nga, ang dami nang nakapagsabi ng, "Ay, magsyota kayo? Akala ko magbarkada lang. Sa galaw nyo kasi parang magbarkada lang kayo e.". Kasi nga raw, madaming baklang prenship tong si labidabs ko, kaya sa kaseksihan ng katawan ko, napapagkamalan na rin akong kumare. Haynaku. Bwahaaaaa.

7. In Times Of Need, Be There
Nalito ba kayo? Long distance nga pinag uusapan e nasabi pang be there. Anyway hiway, you can't physically be there for them of course, but you can still offer comfort. Kung may nangyaring di kanais nais icomfort mo kagad, and express your feelings and desire to help them. Remember that if your partner is upset over a serious event, do not expect them to recover immediately. You should let your partner know that you don't expect them to cheer up immediately and that you'll be there for them the best you can. Importante rin na huwag mong iwang hanging si labidabs if you have to be absent during this period. If they are seriously upset, give them advice on how to make themselves feel better or who to turn to for help (Example: Kain ka na lang ng marami or tulog marami then talk to your best bud later). It would also be a good idea to provide them information to reach you (Eto yung sa part 1) and to let them know that it's okay for them to contact you if they need to. To further make sure that your partner will be alright, ask someone else to check on them and speak with them. You could ask one of their friends or family, or one of your own.

8. Ignore Criticism
Being in a long-distance relationship is hard enough, at mas lalo pa tong pinapahirap ng mga walang magawang ewan bakit pa ginawang mga epal. Just ignore comments such as: "Long-distance relationships don't work." or "They're probably cheating on you." or "Why don't you just get a guy/chic around here?". These people are either misunderstanding, arrogant, or simply have different views (Okay lang yan, normal!). Yea, sobrang hirap ng nasa LDR, but just remember that you may be getting more from your long-distance relationship than other peoples' short-distance relationships. It's about WHO you love and not how CLOSE they are. Love knows no distance! Hooray!

9. Get A Gaming System
Having a gaming system puts more fun into the relationship, because you can then connect through a game and you'll have more to do other than talking. There are tons of great multimedia online role playing games on the net, and you can then connect with not only your partner but some of their friends as well. Computer games are fun with or without someone to play with (though they are usually more enjoyable with someone else). Not into gaming? At least give it a try, especially if your partner is into it. They will appreciate you trying to get into their interest. Buti na nga lang at medyo naimpluwensyahan ko si Sarah to play online games e. And who knows, one day you'll be surprised, mas naadik na si labidabs sa online games dahil sa'yo.(uuuy, may natatamaan n_n)

10. Anger Management
Ito rin yun e, yung reason bakit may bigla biglang sumusulpot na went from being "in a relationship" to "single" tapos balik ulet sa went from being "single" to "in a relationship" na status sa Facebook. Normal lang na there'll be times when your partner is upset, whether they're angry, sad, or anything else. Sa mga ganitong times, a good advice to take would be to reach out and then back off. Attempt to comfort them, and if they accept then you may proceed in doing so BUT also give them space. If they do not accept your attempts to comfort them, then try to give them some space then make an attempt na lang ulet later. May mga tao kasing mas gustong mapag isa pag nagtatransform into a bad wolf, joke, yung pag nasa bad mood, and you should respect that wish. Pero kahit ganun, every now and then, still try to show some affection and support para maramdaman nila na you care for their feelings din. Don't take it to heart if your partner snaps at you during a period of stress. They may later realize what they did and apologize for it. Many people say things they don't mean when they are upset. Isa na jan yung labidabs ko, heeee. Pag si Sarah kasi nagalit, nakuuuuu. Pero she advised me not to listen to her naman when she's in such a mood, lalo na yung mga nasasabi nyang out of this world, haaaaa. To understand your partner when they are upset, discuss with them (when they are in a neutral mood) how they feel during that time and anything you can do to avoid provoking it further. Have them explain why they behave the way they do and whether or not you should take to heart anything they do or say.
If your labidabs snaps at you, huwag kagad gumanti. Remain calm, or else you risk making the situation worse. Trust me, I've been there. You could even tell them that you want to give them space, or you could try to calm them down. But remember: It is natural and okay for someone to have a minor snap when they are in a bad mood. It is NOT okay when they have a major break down to the point that they do/say anything that severely hurts you emotionally. It is NOT okay for your partner to harass or abuse you, no matter how upset they are. If your partner has issues controlling anger, then seek help for them, orayt?

11. Don't Hate—Appreciate!
All too often, people go about in their relationships ignoring the key elements that truly matter. Di pwedeng puro ka lang i love you, appreciate your partner. Give them thanks for everything that they've done, and from there get more specific. Thank them for small and large things. Make sure that you express your appreciation often and vividly. Sa ganitong way, mas mararamdaman yung pagmamahal at, pagbibigay mo ng importance sa labidabs mo. They will also see that you're actually thankful for the things they do for you and will strive to do more in the future. Since you are in a long-distance relationship, you need to work extra hard to make sure your partner knows that you enjoy being with them and that you are thankful for everything they do, kahit na di kayo magkasama.

12. Wag Bossy
Wether ikaw or sya, hindi maganda yung isang tao lang ang nagpapatakbo ng relationship. Having one person run the relationship is unhealthy kasi pinapatay nito yung idea ng relationship, which is something that involves TWO people. Also, it may make the person who isn't running the relationship feel overpowered, causing them to get the feeling na they don't want to be with the other anymore. Letting one person run the show doesn't allow the other to often get what they want or have a chance to share their opinion. Ano ka, si Bossing Vic? It's just a bad thing in any situation. But how do you know that you're in the relationship with one person as the boss? If it is your partner, you may very often find that:
1. Una dito is yung sila lang nasusunod at sila lang ang lging tama.
2. They make all the decisions in the relationship, and ignore your suggestions.
3. They boss you around or tell you what to do (naknang?!)
4. They make you feel weak, lesser, bobo, minuscule.
5. They don't ask for how you feel on a subject involving your relationship.
6. They don't consider your feelings during an argument.
7. It's all about what they say, think, feel, not about you.

Kung may napapansin kang ganito sa relationship nyo, ay naku, may under nga. But if you don't notice these signs on your labidabs, ireview mo sarili mo. Are YOU running the relationship? Look through the list above and decide, or just ask your partner. Kung sakaling feeliing mo lang na parang ina-under mo na ang partner mo, talk to them about it every now and then. Ask them if they feel that you are running the relationship and assure them that you want them to be honest so you can work to fix it. If you feel like your partner is running the relationship, speak with them about it, wag kang matako, wag kang mahiya. Tell them how it makes you feel and how it is hurting the relationship. If they refuse to change or accept what they're doing, it is a serious problem and should be dealt with. Continue to discuss the matter and try to compromise, if they keep ignoring all your attempts then it may be best to give them an ultimatum. Lagi po nating tatandaan, a relationship is consist of two people, and should be run as so. Make decisions together. Take each other's feelings into consideration and do your best to make both people happy.

Talagang mahirap ang long distance relationship. Pero kung maniniwala ka lang, naman men, walang impossible. Loving isn't all about the hearts, dapat din may brain. If you're going to have a relationship, be sure that you can handle it. Sa mga nagsasabing laro laro laang yan, tanginangyan, mamatay na kayo. Di biro ang pagmamahalan, dahil kung wala yan, di rin kayo nakalabas sa bayag ng tatay nyo. What I'm saying is, we have to take a relationship seriously, cause it involves other people's feelings too. If you can't respect them, then, whose going to respect you? Huwag yung collect and collect then select, naknang tupa, nanay mo kaya ginanun, ayos ba sa'yo? Kung laro lang gusto nyo, kitakits na lang sa Flyff, dahil magmemerge na ang tatlong server this January 11, dun ko kayo mapi-PK ng malupet, bow.

Marami nagtatanong, "Do long distance relationships actually work?". Well, I'd like to think that it does. n_n

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