Kung Ako Lang Yung Nanalo

Tapos na eleksyon. Malapit na naman ang pasukan. Pasukan ng mga bata sa skwela. Pasukan ng pera sa bulsa ng mga bagong halal. Pero huwag tayong magpopokus jan, nakaka-stress. Dun tayo sa temang eskwela.

Marami sa mga kamoteng Pinoy ngayong June ang maluha-luha na namang maiinggit sa mga batang papasok sa eskwela. Oo nga't ipinagmamalaki ng ating gobyernong "matuwid" na sangkaterbang scholarships ang nakalaan para sa mga kabataang matatalino ngunit kapos sa pang-aral. Ay anak ng puto-kutsintang-binudburan-ng-bulbul-ni-Mang-Kanor naman yan! It's so unfair! Pano naman yung mga hindi matalino? Nganga na lang ganon? Kung ako yung nahalal nung hi-tek na eleksyon, papag-aralin ko ang lahat ng babaeng magagandang mahirap. Wala nang exam-exam, magdala lang ng whole body picture, pwede na! At wag kayong malisyoso't malisyosa, nagmamagandang loob po lamang. Nakakaawa naman kasi, ang ganda nga, pag tinanong mo naman ng 10 x 5 / 5 = ____. Nganga.

Kaya karamihan sa mga ito, napupunta na lang sa mga club at nasasadlak sa prostitusyon at napupunta lang sa mga Hapong "chin-chin-tabiru" naman kahit maraming pera. Kahapon nga, may nakausap ako, tanong ko sa kanya, "Pano mo sya naging pamangkin?", at sinagot nya ko ng maayos.

"Kasi noon, mag-pinsan lang kami. Pero ngayon, Tita nya na'ko".

O diba ang linaw? Kung makakapag-aral lang sana yun e malamang, mas malinaw pa dun yung eksplinasyon niya. May isang magandang prosti din dun sa Malate, matapos makainom ng tubig baha nung minsang bumagyo, pag-uwi ng bahay, uminom ng mainit na tubig para daw mamatay ang germs. Di ba kawawa? Kaya kung ako ang nasa posisyon, paaaralin ko sila, para fair!

Okay, scholarship para sa lahat na lang. Kasali na din mga mahihirap na di magaganda. Parang luging lugi kasi eh.


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Gamitan Poly-Tics

Sa panahon ng ngayon, gamitan na ang patok sa pulitika. Gamitan ng apelyido.


Photo credits to FB.com/SenyoraOfficial

So sa darating na eleksyon, bahala na kayo kung kaninong anak, pamangkin, apo, o inaanak kayo boboto. Or, let's all not vote na lang kaya? Syempre joke yun :)

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Yuck (A Random Poem)


when i die,
my atoms will come undone;
i'll be space dust, once again.

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10 Reasons To Be Thankful Today


Sa kabila ng mga catastrophic events na nangyayari sa mundo ngayon that creates death, we tend to think about the life we lead. Napapaisip tayo, Oh my sabaw! (ako lang pala yun). In most cases, nagpapasalamat tayo that we're still alive tapos narerealize natin na yung ibang bagay na akala natin ay sobrang bigat na, eh di pala tutumbas sa pinapasan ng iba. And that some shit you worry about isn't as big a deal as it was the day before.

Ang mahirap lang dito eh kung gano ka kadali napaisip nung mga ganung bagay eh ganun din kadali ang pagbalik mo sa pagiging normal. And what I mean with normal is your constant bitching and complaining that you normally do, ay we pala. Di na tayo nagpapasalamat na buhay tayo but instead, we wait for something awful or disastrous to happen to put things into perspective. Ang sarap manampal ng DM's. 

Well anyhow na bangus na may kamatis at sibuyas, here are then ten very simple things to be thankful right now

1. you are reading this blog post, so ibig sabihin, buhay ka pa, sinuswerte nga naman
2. 100% someone out there is in a worse shape than you are..in more ways than one i guarantee you that
3. pusang gala, online ka! That means, nakapagbayad ka ng internet at phone bill nyo, ijot.
4. may tibilisyon ka. Hindi lahat ng tao sa munod mapalad na nanalo ng TV sa pa-raffle ng Central Warehouse Club
5. you have a relative or friend out there that you can talk to. Narealize mo ba kung ilang tao ang nasa san mang panig ng mundo na walang relatives o friends na pwedeng kausapin?
6. may bubong kang nasisilungan.
7. you are free - di lahat ng countries eh may freedom ng tulad ng sa'tin.
8. you slept on a bed last night - think how many people didn't?\
9. you get to have sex - well, some of you. Pero don't you think its awesome?
10. pwede kayong mag isip pa ng another 10 reasons.

Yun lang. Di ko alam kung anong nakain ko at naisipan kong i-type yang mga yan. Pero bahala na si Batman magpaliwanag. Salamat.

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A Secret Affair


Helow helo hilo? Kumusta imaginary friends? Long time no see, but now see now. Ayos lang ba? Sarrreh naman kung ngayon lang ulit nagparamdam. Busy sa eschudent life eh. Alam nyo na, mabait akong eschudent eh. Okay, lessgow sago sa topic.

Napansin ko lang, karamihan sa mga palabas ngayon sa tibilisyon at pelikula, eh dalawang babae na ang nag aagawan sa iisang lalake. Anyare manang? Kaya naisipan ko mag tanong kay Google at pagkatapos ng 0.01784 seconds ay nabigyan nya ko ng 110,789 resulta o kasagutan. Lintek na Google talaga yan oh. Anyhow na bangus, napag alaman kong ang ratio na pala ngayon ng babae sa lalake eh nasa 7:1 na. Daw. Ibig sabihon, may pitong babae sa bawat isang lalake. Oh my sabaw!

Kung iisipin mo nga naman nang mabuti, ramdam na ang kakulangan ng lalake nung magsimula na ang telenovela ni Coco Martin. Mantakin mung, sa dami ng artista, ginawa pa talaga syang dalawa, at may kanya kanyang chikas pa, tsk. Ba't nga ba ito yung tema ko? Eh kasi, nakapanood ako ng movie ni Kuya Derek, yumbang A Secret Affair? Aba tsong, pinag aagawan ng dalawang hot chickens si Koya! Haaaaneep! Sana wag mangyari sakin yon!


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Book Report?

For another couple of nights. Er, maybe weeks, this blog will stink. Well, depends if you're going to drop by and clean this boring niche of mine, LOL. I think I'm gonna be busy. Now there goes the question: Busy doing what?

Woooooooooo. We're asked by our English professor to make some sort of book review (yata, not sure pa) about a Paulo Coelho novel. Anybody familiar with The Alchemist? Yeah that's the one. Hey, if you could give me a report on that, just click on the tab on above (Contact Me), hehe. Just kidding. Even if its just 0.05% from a hundred that our professor will trip on this boring blog, still, its 0.005%, right? :)

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Be Careful of What You Wish For (Lalo na pag may kasunod kang hihiling)

One day, a bus full of not-so-good looking people was stuck on a ditch in a very liblib na place. Then suddenly, a beautiful diwata appeared and made sabi to them that they could make a wish and she will make those wish come true. The first woman on the front seat said,

"I wish to be super gorgeous and beautiful!"

And her wish was granted.

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Signs Ba Kamo?

Pasensya na kung ngayon lang ulit nakapag post? Miss mo ko? LOL

Sa mga umaasa sa signs, nakow, siguraduhin nyo lang na confident kayo :)

See ya later alligater! In a while crocodile :p

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Birthday Guy

Yesterday, 4th of July. While everyone in the United States are flying colorful fireworks, blowing their lungs out on paper and plastic trumpets, straining their arms in waiving the American flag, stretching their necks to see the parades, and crying their hearts out in celebration, I was alone in my room celebrating my birthday with four cups of coffee and a pack of cigarettes.

Celebrated my birthday with a pack of cigarettes, a couple cups of coffee, and a couple of movies :)
Yea yea, some of you my dear imaginary friends would think how lonely my birthday had been. Maybe some dipshit who wanders here for the first time would think that I'm some kind of an introvert, but you're wrong. Actually I'm a psychopath, a frightening one, on weekends, LOL.

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PALiiiTS in School Again

ID (evidence)
Hey hey hey! It's been so long. Since I haven't seen yow face! That wasn't a joke. I know most of you "wandering sweet potatoes" who carelessly wander in this blog are not going to email me your pictures if ever I asked you to. Sorry if I haven't updated this boring niche of mine for like, forever? LOL

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11 Questions About Myself

Hello imaginary friends! Couple of weeks ago, I was tagged by seriousnuts to answer 11 questions about myself. So here it goes;

1. How long have you been blogging?
I started writing online since my college freshman years. I had my first page on tripod, then to Friendster and later tried Blogger.

Are you a procrastinator or do you take care of things right away?
Yea, I procrastinate. I don't know but I always have this idea of "art of keeping up with yesterday" haaa haaaa.

3. If you have siblings, are you close?
Yes we're close. I'm the eldest of us three and the only dude, that's why I'm kinda over-protective over them. Though I can't ask them on some matters, they always find ways to share them to me.

4. What's the best thing about your job? the worst?
The best thing about it is that I don't have to face annoying "real" people and the worst is it alters my body clock. LOL

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Three Best Mothers

This time, my post will be quite serious, and as much as possible, I'm gonna refrain from using foul words like I used to. Eh? If you're still wondering why, I bet you didn't have the time reading the title *winks. See, I'm even nicer to you.

Since we're celebrating Mothers' Day, I think its timely for me to write and share to you how blessed I am to have an awesome line of mothers. Yes, I have mothers, with an "s", pluuuuuural! And sorry, but I wont share them to any of you. Joke. Belonging to a broken family has been a lot easier for me because of my mothers. Because of them, the absence of the so-called "haligi" (foundation) of a home, a father, hasn't really been an issue at all. Well, I must admit that there were times that  I envy my friends when they bring their fathers to school activities, but thinking that I have a lot of Mama's, I'm contented. To honor them, I'll be posting three short poems. I know I'm not very good at this, but nah, I'll take the shot.

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Visual Music Carnival 2012

Hell-ow cool-o-go? Miss me my imaginary friends? I miss you too.

Oh yes, you read it right, a Visual Music Carnival. This is an awesome celebration of visual arts, extreme sports, and rock n' roll music, for a cause. This celebration will happen on May 12, 2012 from 12 noon to 12 midnight at the Amoranto Stadium at Quezon City.


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Happy Earth Day; Seriously?

Is the Earth really happy? Do we deserve to live here?

If we take a survey asking all the people around the world if they deserve this blue-green-white-brown-gray planet called Earth, I'm sure an overwhelmingly large number of these are going to say, "Yes, of course!". Well, what other response could we expect? The opinion of the majority  is expected as this is the mind's response. Even though at the back of the mind of everybody, the knowledge that we haven't treated Earth with respect is there, that the "I, me, mine, my" mentality is fully intact and preserved. If you open up your mind a little wider and take an unflinchingly honest look at mankind and its history, what will you find? Will you still say "Yes, of course!"? 

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12 Places Described By a Single Picture

There are places around the world that can only be summarized by the words "Only in" just because of the things that go on there. So I'm sharing you a few. Hopefully, this'll have a sequel, LOL.

Only in Amsterdam. Hookers are displayed in glass casings. 


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Painting A Room The Metal Head Way

I'm not an interior designer, to begin with, to give you tips on redecorating your room or whatever you want to do with it. Hell, I didn't even study architecture. But every so often, between the boring and busy days of our  lives, something comes along that makes us stop, look, and say, "Hey, that's freaking awesome!". So, with that pretty scratched one-liner of amazement, I felt that it alright to share this dumb discovery. Alright, I've caught wind of a ridiculously amazing video posted by three metal heads. Ostensibly, they had to paint or redecorate a "pink" (hey, pink is a masculine color, b&^%$!), so logically, the first thing that hit their heads is to use their hair instead of paint brush. These three dudes dipped their heads onto a paint bucket, turn on some metal, and started headbanging. Check out the video for the marvelous result.

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My Top 5 Must-Watch Movies This May

Come what may.

Hey, few days from now, Miss April'd be a goner and Miss May'll shake her flowery arse to the people! Anyway, the first line prompted me to write this post, plus the greatness I feel now that I have finished the house plan that held me out from my blog and my ever dearest imaginary readers. Well now, I'm sure some of the movies here are familiar to you, heck, here it goes.

1. The Avengers. Yeah  yeah, they're gonna have the assembly this May. Our childhood superheroes are back, kick some ass!

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More Pun In The Philippines


photo credits to KMJS

Pinoys are generally creative especially in naming everything, genius. No business establishment is deemed too sacred to be spared from creative name-calling, from water purifying stations to bottled water, salons, restaurants, even the smallest business roaming around the Philippines streets. Look around you.

A nickname is the hardest stone that the devil can throw at a man. - William Hazlitt.

 Brilliantly said, and one way to explain why in new world countries, John remains John and Mary will ever be called Mary. But here in the Philippines, though, a nicknamed child is a loved child. And heaven help the child who’s been given a particularly “inspired” nickname.

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12 Funny Quiz Results

When we were in grade school, we're obliged to wake up before 7 am and go to school so we'll be prepared for the adult life ahead of us. Can you still remember all the naughty things you did? (well, if you were one). As I was randomly surfing the net, I came into this photos of quiz results, and I can't help but laugh. Yeah, I know it's kinda low blow to the teachers, but hell, I'm sure these made them chuckle.


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Good News, Bad News

Are you tired of all the daily bad news splattered across every newspapers' front page?

Well, me too.

Husband Shot by Wife, Dead!

Girl, Raped and Killed.

Vice Mayor, Ambushed and Killed.
Stud, Robbed and Killed!
And believe it or not,

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